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Water, Wealth, Contentment, Health, Modesto! Modesto! So chant the citizens of Modesto Town, Where the San Joaquin Valley flattens down. In the land of the lemon, the raisin, the prune, The alfalfa crop and the Harvest Moon. Here where the Mokelumne, Tuloumne, Snolumne - And all the other dry creeks and streams Get together to make Modesto the land of dreams, They've adopted a slogan full of life and fizz, And they stand in the Hotel Hughson and shout it, And they stand in the Hotel Modesto and shout it, And they surge up and down the streets - Both streets - And shout it. And here it is: - Water, Wealth, Contentment, Health, Modesto! Modesto! | |||
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They grow the melons that made Turlock known, They grow the squash that make the flat cars groan, And every famous crop from the grape to the prune Thrived here first, Until the national thirst Ruined Modesto one fateful June, And then the beer was gone - Gone was the saloon. No more pretzel-benders Built Modesto double-enders. But did this kill Modesto? Did this dim her future? If you just suggested it, The councillors would shoot yer. This what they said: - Water, Wealth, Contentment, Health, Modesto! Modesto! | |||
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Yes, there really is water in Modesto, Yes, this part at least is true. There's a fountain in the park Where Modesto sweethearts spark. There are faucets in the wash rooms, too. And now to make this question sure, They are talking of a new storm sewer. Water, Wealth, Contentment, Health, Modesto! Modesto! | |||
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Yes, there really is wealth in Modesto, There's a bank on every corner, Sandwiched in between the bars. Where Modesto sweethearts spark. There are cut glass windshields On the little Ford cars, Yes, there is Wealth in Modesto. Water, Wealth, Contentment, Health, Modesto! Modesto! | |||
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Theirs is the pride of Borden's Milk - The mulberry tree and incipient silk. Here is the succulent sweet potato's lair; Here are grown musk melons for the big State Fair. The trees are contented. The cows are contented. Even the hoboes are partially tented, Down in the camp ground the city has rented, Water, Wealth, Contentment, Health, Modesto! Modesto! | |||
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The farmers are so strong they chew crushed rock, They take bulls by the horns and make Bull Durham out of stock. The Japanese, Chinese, Hawaiians and Koreans Are almost as mighty as their brother Europeans. The Japanese Ju-Jitsu the soil like a tractor; The Chinese prove cheap labor is a factor By making the trees grow twenty-four hours a day, Without extra bonuses or overtime pay. No more pretzel-benders or overtime pay. The remarkable Hawaiians Are the farmer's social lions. They dance the Hula-Hula and the prunes imitate them. They twist and turn upon their stems as the Hula men gyrate them. They fall upon the ground and brown Koreans crate them. Modesto! Modesto! Water, Wealth, Contentment, Health, Modesto! Modesto! | |||
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But the women in Modesto! Oh Boy! But the women in Modesto! Oh Joy! Boy Howdy! Those farmers' wives Lead such healthy lives That their shining faces Light the streets at night. The P.G. & E. goes broke, They use so little light! And the daughters, At the Winter Garden, Or at the movie shows With their rolled up skirts And their rolled down hose Are up to date in everything that goes! This is why they stay up so late They have to do it to celebrate - Modesto! Water, Wealth, Contentment, Health, Modesto! Modesto!
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And everyone who goes thru Modesto | Passes a sign, an arch, on the highway, Visible to all - from every byway. Pure white by day, like the soul of Modesto; Lit up by night like Modesto, too. And all the travelling men, farmers, drummers Immigrants arriving from foreign lands. Theatrical people on one night stands, Look out of their car windows or automobiles Or side-door pullmans with elliptical wheels As through the valley they swiftly flee. And this is the slogan that they all see - Water, Wealth, Contentment, Health, Modesto! Modesto! |